


@JarPadsTitties

by CLeighWrites



Series: SPN Kink Bingo 2020 [4]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Blow Jobs, Breast Fucking, Fluff and Crack, JarPadsTitties, Light Angst, Light Feminization, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, No Covid-19 AU, Smut, Supernatural Kink Bingo 2020, Titty Fucking, Twitter, Twitter Hurts Jared's Feelings, Twitter User @JarPad, Twitter: @JarPadsTitties, j2 smut, messy blow jobs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:11:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26340142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CLeighWrites/pseuds/CLeighWrites
Summary: Jared sees a satire account about a specific part of his body on Twitter, and Jensen helps make him feel better about it
Relationships: Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki
Series: SPN Kink Bingo 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1615648
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	@JarPadsTitties

**Author's Note:**

> I asked a group chat that I’m in on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/cleighwritesspn) for some ideas for my bingo cards, and [@QueenHuds](https://twitter.com/queenhuds) said that she couldn’t stop thinking about Jared’s chest in recent pictures that were posted, so she picked the Titty Fucking square on my Kink Bingo card, and then this happened!
> 
> Also, yes, I created an actual [satire account](https://twitter.com/jarpadstitties) on Twitter, specifically to companion this fic. How could I resist?! Beta assist by @QueenHuds on Twitter and @deanwinchesterswitch on Tumblr, thanks, ladies!!
> 
> This is supposed to be crack.  
> **The boys are married to their wives in this fic, but they do what they want up in Vancouver!**

Jared sat across the lunch table from him, scrolling through his phone, occasionally laughing and showing him hilarious photo edits or thirst tweets from－apparently－dehydrated fans. Jensen was finishing up his salad and Jared his second burger, when Jared’s head tilted to the side, regarding his phone with an uncharacteristically serious face. 

“Midgets or clowns?” Jensen teased, quoting his character of _fifteen years_. 

“Titties,” Jared said, his voice almost awestruck. 

Jensen laughed and looked around to make sure no one was listening in on this part of their conversation. “Well, share with the class!”

Jared shook his head and looked down at himself. He was still in Sam’s clothes, but with something that could only be described as a bib over his front to protect them from his food. When Jared smooshed his shoulders together and furrowed his brow, Jensen’s curiosity got the better of him. He reached over the table and grabbed Jared’s phone; it was still open to Twitter, but it was a text tweet, no titties in sight.

Jensen’s eyes widened as he read the tweet. If it were written in some fanfic, it would say that ‘the laugh that suddenly burst from him was one of those full-bodied, boisterous, belly laughs’. Clearly, whoever had written that tweet had spent quite a bit of time reading, or maybe even writing, such stories. 

“Where do they get this stuff from?” Jensen wondered aloud.

Unable to help himself, Jensen clicked on the profile picture to check out their page. He was greeted with photo after photo of Jared’s chest. Some from when they had first started shooting, some promo shots, the Entertainment Weekly shoots, some of those viral pictures of Jared wet at the beach, all of them cropped only to show Jared’s titties. 

The more Jensen saw, the tighter his pants became, and when Jensen looked up, Jared had a puzzled look on his face. 

“Did you really just check out that account?” Jared asked.

“Yeah, man, it’s all your titties!” Jensen laughed, but cut it short at the look on Jared’s face. “What? It’s hilarious.”

“I don’t have _titties_ ,” Jared defended. He flexed again, Jensen watched as his pecs pushed against the fabric of Sam’s t-shirt. “They’re not even man boobs.”

Jensen understood where Jared was coming from, having experienced his own bouts with fan-stimulated self-awareness about his body image. 

Jensen dropped his voice. “If it’s any consolation, I like your titties,” he purred across the table, hoping to ease Jared’s anxiety. 

Jared pouted and reached to take his phone back, barely glancing at it before he locked it and shoved it back into his pocket. “Whatever, we’re due back soon.” 

Just then, a PA poked their head in and called out a ten-minute warning for them. Jared shoved away from the table and made his way toward the set they were filming on, Jensen watching the tense set of his shoulders as he made his retreat. 

It didn’t take long for Jared’s mood to pick back up; their general lightness between takes helped to alleviate whatever stress the tweet had caused him. They were only shooting until six that afternoon, so they made plans to grab dinner then head over to Jensen’s for a nightcap.

All through dinner－and, a few beers－Jensen couldn’t help but stare at Jared’s chest. When he’d stretch or gesture for the waitress or even as he adjusted his shoulders to eat, Jensen’s eyes watched as his pecs pulled the fabric over his plump muscles and pert nipples. Flashes of pictures from that joke Twitter page clouded his thoughts, and more than once, Jared caught him staring. 

Once they made it into the privacy of Jensen’s apartment, Jared dropped the friendly banter. “Why do you keep staring at me like I’m a steak and you’re on death row?”

Of all the snarky replies that popped into his head, the only thing Jensen could bring himself to say was, “‘Cause I’ve been hard since lunch thinking about that Twitter page, and all through dinner all I could imagine was fucking your-” he motions to Jared’s chest.

“My _titties_ ,” Jared sneered. 

“Yes, Jared, your fucking tits!” Jensen lunged toward him and put a hand on either breast, feeling Jared flex beneath his palms. 

Jensen massaged Jared’s toned chest with his hands as he backed him up against the nearest wall. He tweaked a nipple between his fingers, and his dick twitched when Jared squeaked from the motion. 

“Love your fucking tits, Jare.” Jensen pulled Jared’s shirt up and over his head in one swift, practiced maneuver, and immediately caught one stiff nipple with his lips. 

“Fuck, Jens.” Jared’s voice was already breathy. 

Jensen lavished Jared’s titties with praise, both in the form of words and physical adoration. He toyed with each nipple until they were both pebbled and red from the attention, he molded his hands to the tight mounds of muscle, he whispered how hot it was that Jared had such an amazing chest, how much he loved getting to grope at his breasts.

“Jen,” Jared dragged out his nickname, whining about Jensen’s use of the words ‘breasts’ and ‘titties’. 

“Jared,” Jensen dropped his voice down as low as he could get it to go, Jared’s name flowing out like thick molasses. He nuzzled along Jared’s throat, leaving small bites that would be gone before he got to makeup in the morning. “I wanna fuck your titties.”

Jared honest to God whimpered, then bucked his hips into Jensen’s, their erections rubbing against each other through four layers of material. Jared pawed at Jensen’s jacket until it joined Jared’s t-shirt on the floor a few feet away. Jensen’s shirt landed somewhere closer to the sofa as the pair made their way into the living room, not having the patience to get to Jensen’s bedroom. 

They each stripped out of their shoes, pants, and SAXX before crashing into each other on the plush sofa. Mouths and hands explored well-known sensitive places as they continued to make out. When Jensen couldn’t take it anymore, he climbed his way up Jared’s body, balancing one foot precariously on the sofa’s edge as he straddled Jared’s face. 

“Get me nice and wet for those tits, Jare.” Jared leveled a look at him that reminded him of Sam, which was not a thought he wanted to have at that moment. 

Jared licked his lips and took Jensen into the wet heat of his mouth, almost down to the base. Jensen used to tease that Jared could eat cock so well because all he did was eat, and combined with how big he is, there’s no way Jared couldn’t devour whatever was put in front of him, Jensen’s cock included. Jared wasn’t bothering with getting Jensen off; he was just playing with him, getting him slobbery wet and diamond hard. 

Jensen didn’t waste time once he felt Jared’s drool dripping over his balls; he pulled himself free of his friend’s mouth and looked him in the eye. “Press those titties together for me,” he instructed, nodding to Jared’s massive chest. 

Jared rolled his eyes but flexed and shoved his arms into his torso, plumping up his pecs and giving Jensen a nice hairy berm to fuck against. The coarse hair was a completely different sensation than he was used to having when he’d fuck Danneel’s tits, but it wasn’t unwelcome. The scratch of hair was just the right kind of pleasure-pain on the sensitive underside of his cock to have him really start fucking between Jared’s titties. 

For his part, Jensen couldn’t keep quiet about how good fucking Jared’s tits felt for him. The combination of the hard muscle, instead of soft, pliable flesh, and the coarse hairs stimulating his cock was driving him mad with want. Words that he never thought he would say were steaming from his lips. ‘Love fucking your tits, man’, ‘your hard titties feel so good around my cock’, ‘gonna come all over you’re pretty tits, Jare’. 

Jared’s hands alternated between tightening the half titty-tunnel surrounding Jensen’s cock, grabbing Jensen’s ass, and reaching around to tug on his own dick. The entire time, Jared was spewing filth at Jensen. ‘You like fucking these hairy tits’, ‘gonna use these titties to milk you dry’, ‘always knew you wanted me like this’, ‘next time I’ll wear some lingerie’. 

The mental image of Jared’s muscular mounds tucked into some risqué lace had Jensen tensing up and shooting his load. Spurts of come hit Jared’s chin before he bent his neck and took the head of Jensen’s cock into his mouth and _sucked_. Arms braced on either side of Jared’s head to keep him upright, Jensen allowed himself a few seconds of Jared’s tongue cleaning him up before he slinked his way down Jared’s body to help him with his not-so-little problem. 

Jared didn’t last long with Jensen pulling at his nipples while he sucked him off. He came with a grunt of ‘Jen－sen’ with his hands holding the top of Jensen’s head to keep his cock in Jensen’s throat. Jensen loved when Jared came down his throat, made it so much easier to swallow it all down. 

Once Jared’s cock was done twitching, Jensen licked him clean on his way up. Jared’s eyes were locked on his as he pulled him up by his hair so that they could be face-to-face. They kissed slowly, letting the stress of the day slip away with each pass of their tongues. 

“Thank you,” Jared said after a few minutes, or hours, of laying in each other’s arms on the sofa. 

“You’re welcome?” Jensen answered, surprised to be getting thanked for－yet another－orgasm. 

“Not for that, well,” Jared laughed. “I mean, not only for that. But… I don’t know; I kinda got in my head about them calling my pecs ‘titties’.” He shrugged, lifting Jensen’s head with the movement. 

“Yeah, I could tell,” Jensen said thoughtfully, then leaned back to look him in the eyes as he spoke. “What are friends for, if not to fuck you in the titties when you’re feeling selfconscious!?” 

Jared laughed as he dumped Jensen’s naked ass into the floor. He flailed for a split second before they both jumped over the couch and ran for the shower, laughing and pinching each other’s asses all the way there.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Don't be shy; let me know what you think!


End file.
